Iranians Embrace American Way

No more Danish pastries in Iran:

Iranians love Danish pastries, but when they look for the flaky dessert at the bakery they now have to ask for “Roses of the Prophet Mohammed.”

Bakeries across the capital were covering up their ads for Danish pastries Thursday after the confectioners’ union ordered the name change in retaliation for caricatures of the Muslim prophet published in a Danish newspaper.

Isn’t that silly? The Iranians are throwing any concept of common sense out the window, and letting the overheated emotions of the moment lead them to make fools of themselves. What’s with those people, anyway? Where do they get these ridiculous ideas?

They’re all governed by emotion over there, you know. Not like us Americans. We’re rational. Our actions are guided by facts and logic. You know, if Denmark did something to offend us, we’d deal with our differences like grown-ups, and go right on eating those delicious Danish pastries. If the Belgians offended us, we’d arrange a breakfast meeting and work things out quickly and sensibly, perhaps over some Belgian waffles. If the French offended us, uh…

You know, uh… maybe this is a positive sign. Yeah. The Iranians are following the American example. That’s right — democracy is taking root! Yeah!

Sigh…